Monday, April 19, 2004


John Eden frequently achieves the near-impossible in making the idea of being a parent sound like some crazy kind of fun, rather than a fate worse than death (which is my usual take on the whole thing… ).

For example, this little entry from the weekend:

DIY Breakcore in E2

One of the more obscure features of the Bethnal Green Museum of Childhood is its impressive "make your own breakcore track" installation on the first floor. For only 60p you can, for a limited timescale, mash the place up in front of a captive audience of children.

There are no actual instructions, so please print this off for guidance.

Step 1: Place 30p into the big red fire engine mini-ride. This provides the necessary droning engine noises and sirens.

Step 2: Place infant (preferably your own or a friend's) into said fire engine.

Step 3: Place another 30p into the adjacent Wurlitzer jukebox and select "1712": "Pass the Dutchie" by Musical Youth.

Step 4: Encourage infant, and any passing children or adults to exclaim "Selector!!!" or "Murder Style!!!" very loudly. Ignore confused looks of other parents and staff members.

Step 5: Enjoy your industrial reggae mash up!


posted by dubversion at 9:06 am

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